if you never bend

Some days are better than others

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 13:46:53 GMT

So, it's been 4 years since I started dating the most wonderful, smart, sexy, funny, awesome, giving, every-other-adjective-of-kickass woman in this or any other galaxy.

In a little less than a year, we'll be going down the aisle to proclaim to the world something I've long known - this is my soulmate. This is my family. This is my life. This is everything I never knew I wanted until it happened. This is my bride.

I wouldn't trade the worst day with her for the best day without her. I can't help but gush with overly sentimental saccharine. I can't find the right words so I resort to Hallmark worthy boasts.

What can I say? She's the only one for me. The best of times, the worst of times; she's been there for me when she had every right to walk away. That kind of faith leaves me in awe. That kind of love breeds only more of the same.

I know I'm barely stumbling through this coherently. It's like trying to fill a teacup with a tidal wave. This pathetic medium just isn't enough to express my love. I'm glad I've got the rest of my life to show her how grateful I am to have her.

I love you. Yesterday. Now. Forever. Until the goddamn stars go dark.

holy crap!

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 02:44:20 GMT

Totally fake, but beyond awesome. There's a lot of little touches for those that have read the comic obsessively :)

Wed, 18 Feb 2009 21:29:09 GMT

- Describe me in one word... just one single word. Positive or negative.

- Leave your word in a comment before looking at what words others have used.

-Then copy and paste the meme to your journal to find out how people will describe you when limited to one word.

Mon, 16 Feb 2009 15:46:55 GMT

Home ownership, day 18; the story so far (in vaguely chronological order)...

Had refrigerator and washer / dryer delivered. Sears outlet¹ is awesome.
http://tinyurl.com/cd5mow = 900 bucks!

While trying to hook up clothes washer, discovered that the old hot hose was seized up onto the valve.
Cut the copper above the valve and installed new one.

Installed new thermostat.

Primered the basement and main level with *huge* help from GerAmyMo. Painted the living room² and kitchen³.

Water heater blew an element. By blew, I mean it actually expelled itself from the unit. In an elegant bit of serendipity, I bought a shop-vac that morning on a whim.
Installed new elements and thermostats on water heater.

Main sewage line from house stopped up and dumped (thank god) only clothes washer and shower water.
Vacuumed up sudsy water for a few hours. Had plumber snake sewage line. I can fix a lot of things, but some shit⁴ you leave to the professionals.

Installed 2 ceiling light fixtures.

Tonight's experiment: Can I install a new single gang outlet and a garbage disposal? stay tuned!

Also putting a new faucet in, but that I've actually done before.

¹Scratch N Dent Warehouse!
²Green!
³Burgundy!
⁴Pun!

Wed, 04 Feb 2009 15:58:46 GMT

hi internets.

I got engaged.

We bought a house.

pictures later.

bye internets.

Wed, 19 Nov 2008 12:28:53 GMT

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third, a quarter of a beer. The bartender says "You're all idiots", and pours two beers.

Tue, 04 Nov 2008 20:56:25 GMT

so very very wrong...but I can't help myself

What's the difference between Sarah Palin's mouth and her vagina?

Not everything that comes out of her vagina is retarded.

Sun, 26 Oct 2008 05:07:32 GMT

holy crap. mr. boddy from the clue movie was lee ving, lead singer of FEAR.

"i love living in the city!"

voting

Tue, 21 Oct 2008 16:06:21 GMT

for Maryland residents, you can go here to view all items up for vote in your jurisdiction.

http://www.mdelections.umd.edu/voter_registration/v2/vote_prod.php

Know your issues!

Tue, 21 Oct 2008 13:26:11 GMT

They had his funeral. Carried him down to the graveyard.
Dolemite was dead, but his dick was still hard.
The preacher said, "Ashes to ashes, and dust to dust."
Said, "I'm glad this little bad muthafucka called Dolemite is no longer here with us!"

R.I.P. Rudy Ray Moore

And now it's time for....

Wed, 01 Oct 2008 13:34:40 GMT

The VP debate drinking game.

here are the rules:
A "Drink" is defined as a simple sip of whatever beverage you prefer. No straight shots please. Alcohol poisoning is never fun.

Every time Sarah Palin bats her eyelashes, or does anything coquettish at all really: 1 drink

Every time Joe Biden's mouth starts a'running long before his brain has a chance to intervene: 1 drink

Every time Sarah Palin uses the wrong talking point (IE. "So health care reform and reducing taxes and reining in spending has got to accompany tax reductions." when talking about the Bailout): 2 drinks

Every time Joe Biden mentions "Washington insiders" or "Golden parachute": 2 drinks

add your own in the comments!

Fri, 26 Sep 2008 02:51:46 GMT

ok, so the 2 kids 1 sandbox video is making rounds again. i remember it from damn near a decade ago and it's still just as fucked up.

on another side, i <3 the spore and you should friend Cacie and augalicious and let me know so i can friend you back.

twizzurp

Tue, 09 Sep 2008 12:02:08 GMT

22:48 @MagneticOrNot holy crap. sporesporespore. spore on the PC. spore on the iphone. it's evolution in stereo!!! #

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yes, i am a huge dorkus

Sun, 07 Sep 2008 21:15:02 GMT

LHC rap

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 01:32:55 GMT

ganked from woodstick

twizzurp

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 12:02:16 GMT

19:16 Playstation 3: better than anal. #

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ha!

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 13:10:35 GMT

further proof the LHC is going to kill us all:

DOOMDOOMDOOMDOOMDOOMDOOM

twizzurp

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 12:01:49 GMT

00:22 @MagneticOrNot @electricpenguin artmosphere? more like fartmosphere </ironical jokesterism> #

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twizzurp

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 12:01:49 GMT

00:27 @cacie iknorite!? Exciting! #

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twizzurp

Sat, 23 Aug 2008 12:02:25 GMT

16:25 @afterknowledge it's at a converted apartment building on aspen ct. near carrol ave. #

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twizzurp

Sun, 17 Aug 2008 12:10:47 GMT

00:29 @rowancorbettcorbett holy crap! He should be forced to compete with dolphins. #

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twizzurp

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 12:11:42 GMT

19:16 BarackRoll! omfgcakes. #

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twizzurp

Mon, 11 Aug 2008 12:12:56 GMT

21:22 Isaac Hayes has returned to Xenu's bosom. #

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twizzurp

Sat, 09 Aug 2008 12:08:26 GMT

12:49 @mirandroid i find it to be too hot. #

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twizzurp

Fri, 08 Aug 2008 12:12:15 GMT

21:04 @rowancorbettcorbett no problems for me. I dont see any dupes from you. #

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